Recently, a certain "fan" of 3dg has begun leaving messages that attempts to belittle the absolute greatness that is Three Drunk Guys. Of course, you'll never be able to knock us down a peg. Well, Anonymous, I'm calling you out.

Over on a certain, yet possibly fictional blog called Path of Most Resistance, MKSP has written a very nice piece about how great Canada is. Of course, no list of Canada's greatness is complete without 3dg sitting right there at the top - although MKSP appears to know a lot more about Canada than I do, so we may be bumped back to second... maybe third.

In any event, Anonymous (if that is his real name) had this to say about Three Drunk Guys:

IMPORTANT: Canada (and yes I have been given permission to speak on their behalf) takes no responsibility for 3 Drunk Guys and/or any opinions expressed in their rants or the impression you have of Canadians due to their disturbing love of cheap beer, sandwiches and cowbell.

First of all, Anonymous, no, I don't believe you have been given permission to speak on Canada's behalf. How do I know this, well, that's simple. In case you didn't get the memo, Three Drunk Guys have taken over the Canadian government in a quiet, bloodless coup... we're just waiting until the Stanley Cup is in Edmonton's hands before announcing it. Therefore, it would be impossible for you to speak on behalf of Canada, because we are Canada. Just ask Brokeback... he knows.

Second, our rants are not opinions. They are in fact, fact. You Anonymous, are a douche bag. How do I know this? Simple. Because it's a fact. In the words of a certain eight fingered yellow philosopher:

You can use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true.
- Homer J. Simpson

Third, and finally, we do not have a "disturbing love of cheap beer, sandwiches and cowbell." Three Drunk Guys has just the right kind of love for cheap beer, sandwiches and cowbell... and that love is a very appropriate appreciation for buck-a-beer beer, nine-pound sandwiches, and the greatest musical instrument in the world. After all, I have a fever, and the only prescription is MORE COWBELL.

So Anonymous, I'm calling you out! Stop hiding behind the mask of anonymity. Face me, man-to-man. Come on, skin that smoke wagon and see what happens!

From now on I see a red sash, I kill the man wearing it. So run you cur. And tell the other curs the law is coming. You tell 'em I'm coming! And Hell's coming with me you hear! Hell's coming with me! - Wyatt Earp